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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




There's a great art says Mickey Dolan in knowing what not to know whin yez don't want to know it

Puns Home









"There's a great art," says Mickey Dolan, "in knowing what not to

know whin yez don't want to know it."











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Viewed 1918



Puns

Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
What A Fearful Night I Had When I Drew This Gun The First Time
You Have A Bad Cold He Said
She--you Used To Call Me The Light Of Your Life
Why Do They Make Those Oriental Pipes With Bowls As Big As Water Pitchers
Did The Minister Say Anything Comforting
A Poacher Surprised At His Work And Pursued In His Escape By A Vengefully Thrown Axe Remarked As He Vaulted A Fence: I Have No Fault To Find With Your Remarks But I Object To The Axe-sent
Swatter--i See You Are Mentioned In One Of The Books Just Published
Wife--got A Dollar
What Is The Difference Between The Admission To A Dime Museum And The Admission To Sing Sing
I'm The Champion Long Distance Cornet Player
A Man And His Bride By The Parson Were Tied And When The Performance Was Done Alas
The Weary Desert Stretched For Miles
This Is An Interesting Clock Miss Said The Salesman You Really Should Have One Especially If You're Bothered With Tiresome Callers
An Emblem Of Tenuity We Witness Every Day; Behold The Corset-and You'll See The Whale-bone Comes To Stay
Did You Go Into Any Of The New York Restaurants
I Understand That Willoughby Was Half Seas Over At The Sneerwell Dinner
Ida--yes Dear This Is One Of Those 'perfume' Concerts The Same As They Have In New York
What Is The Best Way To Raise Cabbage
Can You Swim Little Boy
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
She--they Say The Eyes Are The Windows Of The Soul I Believe
With Cards And Dice And Dress And Friends My Savings Are Complete; I Light The Candle At Both Ends And Thus Make Both Ends Meet
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
Visitor--oh What A Nice Parrot You've Got