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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




You never bought a gold brick did you

Puns Home









"You never bought a gold brick, did you?" asked the admiring

friend.



"Not exactly," answered Mr. Cumrox. "But I once came mighty near

having a French count for a son-in-law."











Next: The fate of Lot's wife Was all her own fault; She first turned to rubber And then turned to salt

Previous: MEDIUM--Do you believe in spirits



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Puns

Of The Heroine In One Of The Latest Sensational Novels It Is Said: Her Eyes Chained Him To The Spit
Don't Doubt The Veteran Who Tells You He Was Always Where The Bullets Were Thickest; Perhaps He Was Hiding Under The Ammunition Wagon
Do You Think The Things One Eats Have A Direct Effect On One's Disposition
Held By The Enemy--the Ulster Which We Are Unable To Redeem
Dear Said The Physician's Wife When Can You Let Me Have Ten Dollars
Slopay--and Doctor If You Will I Wish You Would Give Me Something To Help My Memory
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
So You Paid $1,000 For A Cook Stove
Brown--up At Hagenbeck's Show There Is A Large Bear That Hugs A Woman Without Killing Her
She--i Had A $5 Bill In This Dictionary Yesterday And I Can't Find It Anywhere
Franklin--do You Know I Started In Life As A Barefooted Boy
Yankee--i Say Britisher Can You Spell Horse
She--they Say The Eyes Are The Windows Of The Soul I Believe
Me Eyes Is Crossed Sighed Kate
Did Any Of You Ever See An Elephant's Skin
Clara--he Gave Me An Army-and-navy Kiss
If You Want To See A Strong Organization Look At The Whisky Dealers; If You Want To See A Weak One Look At The Consumers
Say Dad What Is An Expert Accountant
The Man--edison's A Wonder Isn't He
I Saw A Big Rat In My Cook-stove And When I Went For My Revolver He Ran Out
Askit-what Is A Convenient Fall Trip For Me To Take
Stranger--boy Can You Direct Me To The Bank
I Understand That Willoughby Was Half Seas Over At The Sneerwell Dinner
Why Do You Call That Colored Man A Blackmailer
I've Been Married Five Years And I've Got A Bushel Of Children